7 Words: Father, Forgive Them

“Father, forgive them, for they do not know what they are doing.” Luke 23:34

[Before we get started, I want to acknowledge several things. First of all, it is an honor to be invited to come and preach as a guest preacher. It is a distinct honor to be trusted with the Word of God, even though we have had little or no interaction before. This week as we worship together, I hope to get to know you better and for you to get to know me as well.

The second thing I’d like to acknowledge is that it is hard to preach to people I don’t know. I don’t know your names, I don’t know what you’ve struggled with, and I don’t even know your language. I apologize for needing to use a translator, but I thank you for the chance to bring God’s Word to you.]

I also admit that I am not fluent in your culture. There are things that are perfectly normal here in Lusaka that are completely foreign to me as an American. There are things that I do that you would find completely crazy, but they happen all the time in the United States.

One thing I’ve found out is that we deal with conflict very differently. In the United States, there are different ways to deal with conflict, but what seems to work best is directness. If you’ve wronged me, if at all possible, I will go directly to you and tell you. For example, three years ago I was moved to a new district, and my new district superintendent asked me to serve on the district leadership team. After I had been serving on the team for a year, we got a new superintendent. I was a couple of minutes late to the first meeting, and when I got there, the new DS told me, “you can wait out there…”

I was pretty offended… “I’m part of this team; why shouldn’t I come in?” After all, the reason I was late was because we had a brand new baby. So later, I went to the DS and asked him what the story was (see that – direct confrontation) and I found out that the former DS had not really added me to the team at all. But what I wanted to point out here was that I directly confronted the DS about the issue, and in my culture, that is completely expected and not offensive whatsoever.

However, when I was in Russia, I asked my roommate if he had taken some of my cold Cokes from the fridge, and he was very offended that I had confronted him directly. In their culture, I should have gone to his friend and asked instead of asking him directly.

But no matter what our home culture is, and no matter what it is that might offend us, the fact is that Jesus calls his followers to a life of forgiveness. It is also one of the hardest things for most of us to do.

Because we have every reason to be offended. We have suffered every sort of wrong, no matter who we are or what we’ve done (or not done) to deserve this treatment. But whatever we have suffered, Jesus has suffered it along with us. And his response: He asks God to forgive them, because they don’t know what they are doing.

There are lots of people who tell us what to do. Jesus not only instructs, but he shows us as well. While he is dying, being tortured on the cross, he asks God to forgive those who are killing him. Jesus says, “Love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you.” This is how he lives it out.

It makes sense that the first word of Jesus from the cross is a word of forgiveness. That’s the point of the cross, after all. Jesus is dying so that we might be forgiven for our sins, so that we might be reconciled to God for eternity.

But the forgiveness of God through Christ doesn’t come only to those who don’t know what they are doing when they sin. In the mercy of God, we receive his forgiveness even when we do what we know to be wrong. God chooses to wipe away our sins, not because we have some convenient excuse, and not because we have tried hard to make up for them, but because he is a God of amazing grace, with mercies that are new every morning.

As we read the words, “Father, forgive them,” may we understand that we too are forgiven through Christ. As John writes in his first letter, “But if we confess our sins to him, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all wickedness” (1 John 1:9). Because Christ died on the cross for us, we are cleansed from all wickedness, from every last sin. We are united with God the Father as his beloved children. We are free to approach his throne of grace with our needs and concerns. God “has removed our sins as far from us as the east is from the west” (Psalm 103:13). What great news!

When we recognize Jesus’ heart, that in his dying breaths, he asked God the Father to forgive those who were crucifying him, then it puts our offenses and those who have sinned against us into perspective.

Peter asked Jesus how many times they should forgive someone who sinned against him – up to seven times? (Just as an aside, he was being generous). Jesus answered, “I tell you, not seven times, but seventy-seven times.” He goes on to relate a story about two servants.

The first servant owed his master ten thousand talents, meaning millions of kwacha. Because he couldn’t pay his master back, the master ordered that he, his wife and children, and everything they had, be sold to repay the debt. “The servant fell on his knees before him. ‘Be patient with me,’ he begged, ‘and I will pay back everything.’ The servant’s master took pity on him, canceled the debt and let him go.”(Matthew 18:26-27)

“But when that servant went out, he found one of his fellow servants who owed him a hundred denarii (a few kwacha). He grabbed him and began to choke him. ‘Pay back what you owe me!’ he demanded. (Matthew 18:28)

Though the second servant begged, because he could not pay back the debt, the first servant had him thrown in prison. The other servants saw what happened and they reported back to the master. “Then the master called the servant in. ‘You wicked servant,’ he said, ‘I canceled all that debt of yours because you begged me to. Shouldn’t you have had mercy on your fellow servant just as I had on you?’ In anger his master turned him over to the jailers to be tortured, until he should pay back all he owed.” (Matthew 18:32-34)

Jesus ends with a zinger: “This is how my heavenly Father will treat each of you unless you forgive your brother from your heart.”

Is there any doubt that God calls us to forgive? We know we are supposed to forgive, but did you ever think that the unforgiveness that you hold is sinful? The debts others owe to us are in no way comparable to the debt we owe to God. God has forgiven our million dollar debts… how have we responded to the debts that others owe to us?

Did you notice how the parable ends? The unforgiving servant is turned over to be tortured. Honestly, living in unforgiveness is torture itself. People are often unable to receive healing when they won’t release others and forgive them. Many mental issues are tied to bitter unforgiveness. Doctors have even linked unforgiveness and bitterness to diseases such as arthritis and cancer. Furthermore, the servant has to pay off the original debt. God the Father will do the same for any believer who does not forgive a brother’s offense. Why would God require this of us? Because when we withhold forgiveness, we are in fact standing in judgment over them. We are playing God. We are saying that Jesus died for my sins, but he’s not sufficient for yours.

We can’t have it both ways!

If you are feeling put on the spot here, please know that this is a message of mercy and warning, not harsh judgment. I’m not trying to cause guilt and shame if you haven’t forgiven someone. I know how hard it is. I have been betrayed, and I know it’s hard.

Satan wants us to sit in judgment over others, withholding forgiveness from them. He reminds us of the pain they caused us. He reminds us of the wrongs they’ve done again and again. When someone has been hurt by someone else, human justice says “They will stand trial for what they’ve done and pay if found guilty.”  God is the Judge, and He will pronounce righteous judgment, repaying everyone according to His righteousness.

So how do we escape the trap of revenge and unforgiveness? We put on Christ. Ask the Holy Spirit to change your heart. You have to start with a willing heart. If your heart isn’t willing to forgive, your responsibility is to allow the Holy Spirit to transform you.

The next step to healing is to recognize and admit that you are hurt. Your hurts are real. Forgiveness does not mean that you have to pretend you weren’t hurt.

When you have forgiven, God calls you to take it a step deeper, to pray for the person who has hurt you. And you’ll realize that you have laid down a heavy burden, and you are closer to Christ!